Why Most Online Coaches Fail (and How to Fix Your Business Systems) with Arielle DeYampert
There's a hard truth that a lot of coaches don't want to hear: Your business problems are often coaching problems in disguise.
I know that statement might ruffle some feathers, especially in an industry flooded with business coaches, marketing gurus, lead-generation experts, and social media growth hacks. But after 15 years in the fitness industry and nearly a decade building Tailored Coaching Method, I've learned something that's impossible to ignore:
The coaches who get the best results retain clients longer, generate more referrals, and build more successful businesses.
Not because they're better marketers.
Because they're better coaches.
In this episode of the Choose Hard Podcast, I sat down with Arielle DeYampert, Director of Coaching at Tailored Coaching Method, to answer questions from coaches and dive into what actually creates sustainable success in the coaching industry.
And honestly? Most coaches are focusing on the wrong things.
Catch the full episode here:
The Coaching Industry Has a Coaching Problem
One of the biggest issues we see today is that coaches are trying to solve business problems before they've mastered coaching.
They want more leads, followers, and sales calls- but they haven’t mastered onboarding, communication, retention, or trust.
The reality is that coaching comes first.
If your coaching isn't exceptional, no marketing strategy in the world will save you long term.
Sure, you can generate leads, run adds, and create content.
But if clients aren't getting results, sticking around, and referring other people to you, you're constantly starting over.
Arielle brought up something that perfectly illustrates this.
When she first stepped into TCM, she didn't spend her time worrying about marketing. She focused entirely on coaching, systems, communication, retention, and client results.
That's what allowed her roster to grow.
Not because she became a social media expert, but because she became an exceptional coach.
Why Trust Is the Ultimate Coaching Skill
If I could choose one skill every coach should master, it would be trust, because TRUST CHANGES EVERYTHING.
When clients trust you:
They adhere better
They communicate more honestly
They stay longer
They refer more people
They get better results
Trust doesn’t happen on it’s own, either. You have to build it. And the problem is that most coaches have no framework for creating trust.
They think trust comes from certifications.
Or credentials.
Or posting educational content.
Those things do help.
But trust is ultimately built through consistent actions, communication, vulnerability, empathy, and leadership.
Clients need to feel understood before they'll allow themselves to be coached. If they don’t trust you fully, they’re not buying in fully to your process.
And if they don't buy into the process, results become significantly harder to achieve.
The Biggest Mistake Coaches Make With Client Results
One thing we discussed extensively was the tendency for coaches to stay surface level.
Surface-level coaching creates surface-level results.
A coach can write a meal plan, create a workout program, adjust macros….but those things alone don’t create transformation.
Transformation happens when a coach helps someone become a different version of themselves.
That's why so many clients lose weight only to gain it back.
The problem wasn't their nutrition plan…it was that their identity never changed.
They achieved a physical result without creating a psychological transformation.
When coaching is done correctly, clients don't just lose weight.
They become more confident. More disciplined. More resilient. More self-aware. More intentional.
That's the real transformation- and that’s what creates LASTING results.
Why Coaches Need To Understand Human Psychology
One of my favorite parts of this conversation was our discussion around the all-or-nothing mindset.
Every coach has dealt with this.
A client follows the plan perfectly.
Then they eat a cookie.
Which somehow turns into:
"I already messed up."
Which turns into:
"I'll start over Monday."
Which turns into:
An entire weekend off-plan.
Most coaches respond by saying something like: “just be more logical.”
That’s not coaching, though. Not really. That’s just advice.
The question isn't whether someone should be more logical.
The question is: HOW CAN YOU HELP THEM become more logical in the moment?
That's where coaching becomes powerful.
Arielle explained something we teach extensively at TCM.
When people become emotionally activated, they stop operating from the highest level of their thinking.
They're no longer making decisions based on logic, but instead are using emotion.
And until a coach understands how to help someone regulate those emotions, they're going to continue repeating the same cycles.
This is why psychology matters.
This is why communication matters.
This is why behavior change matters.
Because macros don't solve emotional eating.
People do.
The Difference Between Pain and Desire
Another major topic we discussed was motivation.
Most people assume motivation disappears. I don’t think that’s true. I think motivation CHANGES.
Many clients start their journey motivated by pain.
They're uncomfortable. Unhappy. Frustrated. Embarrassed. Their clothes don’t fit. Their confidence is low. Their energy is low.
The pain from this gets people moving, but eventually, that pain decreases.
They lose some weight.
They gain momentum.
Life improves.
Now they're no longer driven by pain, and then they get stuck….Because they've never learned how to be driven by desire.
They only know how to move away from something, but not TOWARD something.
The best coaches help clients make this shift.
Instead of asking:
"What are you trying to avoid?"
They begin asking:
"What are you trying to build?" or "What do you truly want?" or "What kind of person are you becoming?"
That shift changes everything.
Because desire creates sustainability.
Why Referrals Are Earned, Not Requested
One of the most important lessons for coaches is understanding referrals.
Everybody wants referrals.
Few people understand what actually creates them.
A referral is one of the highest forms of trust a person can give.
Think about it- When someone refers you, they're putting their reputation on the line. They're essentially saying: "I trust this coach enough to attach my name to their service."
That's powerful, and only happens when results are undeniable.
That’s especially true in fitness.
People are already vulnerable and insecure and struggling with something deeply personal.
Which means referring a coach requires even more trust than referring a restaurant or product.
That's why the best referral strategy isn't asking for referrals, it’s just becoming so good that people can’t NOT talk about you.
The Secret To Long-Term Success
At one point we discussed something I think every coach needs to hear:
You don't know what you don't know.
That's true for clients and it’s true for coaches.
Every successful coach I know invests in mentorship, education, and their own growth. The moment you think you've figured everything out is the moment you stop growing.
I currently have multiple coaches myself.
Not because I need someone to tell me what to do, because I want someone to challenge me.
Push me.
Expose my blind spots.
The best coaches stay coachable.
Always.
The Future Belongs To Better Coaches
The fitness industry doesn't need more influencers. It needs better coaches.
It needs people who understand behavior changes.
Communication.
Trust.
Psychology.
Leadership.
It needs professionals who genuinely care about helping people transform their lives.
The coaches who succeed over the next decade won't necessarily be the loudest or have the largest following, or make the coolest videos.
They'll be the coaches who consistently help people achieve meaningful, lasting change.
That's the mission.
That's why we're building the Online Coaching Specialist Certification.
That's why we're growing the mentorship.
And that's why we're having conversations like this on the Choose Hard Podcast.
Because if we can create better coaches, we create better outcomes.
And better outcomes change lives.
If you're a coach reading this, remember:
Don't obsess over the next marketing tactic. Don't chase every shiny object.
Master your craft. Become exceptional at helping people. Build trust. Deliver results.
Everything else gets easier after that.